Something different:

I want to rant about something different tonight.  I wanna rant about porn.

Why does porn always have to show somebody's dick?  I don't wanna see that.  If I want to see a dick I can just look down at my own.  I watch porn for the pussy, goddamnit.

And why the fuck do they all have to shave their pubes off, anyway?  What the fuck?  Whatever happened to all the beautiful ladies with big hairy bushes around their cunts?  And why is it so hard to find real women who don't shave anymore?  What's up with that?  I just wanna find a nice crazy woman, (Yeah, they're all crazy!) close to my own age, (within twelve years younger or older,) with a calm personality, with hairy pussy and pits, who likes to pee.  Am I asking too fuckin much here?  I'm drawn to petite brunettes with long straight hair, but I'm open to any woman, (yeah, even the shaved ones, I reckon) as long as she doesn't try to change me...

Well, this started out as a rant about porn, but it segued into a tirade about hairy pussy and ended up with me making an (almost) desperate plea for a new girlfriend.   Fuck.

I think I fuckin think too fuckin much, I think.
Time to go watch more Joe Cartoon.

Bye, yall.